To borrow a page from Real Time with Bill Maher, I’ve decided to enact some ‘New Rules’, Giants style.
New Rule, for the love of god stop playing Rich Aurilia. I don’t care if he has great career numbers against Randy Johnson, he looks completely done and after last season, who could argue the opposite? Aurilia is hitting (.209/.261/.209) in 43 AB’s without an extra base hit. I repeat, our slugging first baseman doesn’t have an extra base hit! The last time Rich Aurilia had a truly awesome offensive season — 2001, OPS+ of 146 — 0-Town was making music. Yes, that O-Town. It’s time to stop the nostalgia experiment and start anyone — Ort, Bowker, Nate — at first to see what they’ve got.
New Rule, Aaron Rowand please sit down until you can actually field your position. Listen Aaron, I know you’re a gamer, and tough, and composed of tiny grit particles but if you can’t field your position, you’re doing more harm than good by playing. Rowand is obviously bothered by his ribs and made another error in last nights game when he couldn’t get to a looping single in center that then turned into an error because the ball skipped off his glove on a hop. He looks extremely stiff and unable to move around very well. During the TV broadcast they kept showing Rowand in the dugout grimacing in pain. You aren’t going to push this team over the top and if it’s one thing we have, it’s eleventy billion OF’s. I think we can find someone to play your spot for a week until you heal.
New Rule, play Fred Lewis. I don’t care if he was a lefty against Randy Johnson last night, he’s been one of the better hitters over the past couple of weeks. Furthermore, Lewis came in the game during the 8th as a PH against a lefty and served a single to LF. The Giants had supposedly been scouting RJ’s minor league work before the game, were they watching the same guy I was? Johnson looked extremely old and his fastball was topping out around 91-92 for the night. He also couldn’t throw his fastball for strikes.
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Best comment on the TV side of the night: “Looks like Johnson is bringing back the mullet” — Mike Krukow. I don’t think the mullet ever left, Mike.
New Rule, let Barry Zito surf! The difference between green and gold Zito and black and orange Zito is that he was allowed to surf. I know his stuff has been going down the tube or better over the fence even before he was a Giant, but what can you do? He’s tinkering with his delivery, just let him go to the beach and enjoy the waves and maybe build arm strength so his fastball might hit 89.9 mph. C’mon Sabean and McGowan let him hang 10 so he won’t hang curveballs.
Hac Man Fever (awesome name, btw!),
At this point, I’m ready to try anything. Let him surf, eat tofu, sky dive, and burn incense all at once if it’ll help his arm.